Lovers of the Bright One
a devotee at Adi Da Samrashram
December 1 - 4, 2008
author was at Adi Da Samrajashram in Fiji, helping to make a film about Beloved
Adi Da. As it would turn out, he would be there at the time of Adi Da's Divine
December 1, 2008
I am in Fiji on retreat now. I was a few hundred
meters from Adi Da at the time of His leaving the body. We buried Him yesterday.
There are few words to describe the heartbreak, and the love I feel for Adi Da,
Whoever He was and is, altogether. We had just been documenting Him on film in
the last six weeks (how is that for timing). We were also documenting the extraordinary
Spiritual process He was taking people through in "Transmission Sittings"
here. We had the grace of being able to interview people as they came from the
Sittings with Him in the Silver Hall. Again and again they would utter words about
having received the Bright Revelation of Prior Unity and being utterly transformed.
I, along with many others who have flocked to be here now at this time, are being
brightened and overwhelmed with His perfect Touch of Bliss. I feel Him opening
up the head and melting down into the body. The air on this Island is thick with
His Presence. To participate in the ongoing vigil of His passing here is to be
in a Bright, heart-opening Realm.
I share the praise and love of a Master
Who will be recognised more in the coming years for the unbelievable and ignored
massive wealth He left the world, far exceeding the humble abodes He lived in
on this island.
His unending insistance on Reality Itself as opposed to
our reality was like a great Lion who would not hesitate to roar and bite off
your head, if it would bring you one step closer to liberation. And then laugh
and make a joke in the next moment! He "played" in the places that we
fear the most. And He won. He already had won — that is the point.
Nothing changed when He left the body. Except, the Revelation of Brightness
and the feeling of His unmistakable Touch and warm Embrace became all the more
potent. Also: something in this mind-blowing process feels like it has ultimate
importance, but right now I am too mentally "mashed" with the moment
to grasp what it is.
December 2, 2008
I see here on
the island a group of inspiring, devoted, and rather extraordinary people, who,
like me, know that Adi Da is their Guru. It is totally profound to be here at
this time. The vigil continues and deep, deep Bliss is pervading everything. Adi
Da had said that on His dropping the body there may well be signs of the magnification
of His Siddhi. That is definitely my confession and the confession of others here.
As I write this, I am feeling Him pouring into the head from above.
holding onto the form of the Bright One, and the place where there is only the
Brightness felt as all-pervading Love-Bliss, where there is no perceived world
or other. This is how it is being shown to me, clearly and spontaneously authenticated
directly through the being, which is being undone in this Perfect, Bright Unity.
an absolute wonder to be undone in perfect Love, without having any damn qualifications
for it whatsoever!
December 4, 2008
It's late, writing
from this Blissful Heaven Loka of Adi Da Samrajashram in Fiji. Many hours of chanting
and dissolving. Thank you, Lord . . . You did not leave us. Your Presence is brighter
and more attractive then ever.
Many more people are here now, and the grieving
has become mixed with a great joy. Most of us are westerners and what do we know
of Enlightenment. So it was kind of scary when Beloved Adi Da left the Body, for
me at least.
And then to reconnect with the One He always is in feeling
and really get it: He never left! As He said: I
will never leave you.
Over the last few days since His Mahasamadhi,
this process of discovering that His Brightness continues so strongly has healed
something in my understanding of death.
What has been totally profound
being here now is that the deepening process that started in the Transmission
sittings in the Silver Hall with Him just over a week ago continues now —
there is no difference. Of course, it is sad and hard to come to terms with the
knowledge that you will never again see the living Enlightened Form so totally
translucent as in this last year. I could not believe it when I saw Him this year:
He was so much more vulnerable in appearance — like a tissue paper lantern
— glowing through translucent skin. I looked at His hands in one Darshan;
I don't know why I focused on them, but their beauty blew my mind. . . .Oh how
I longed to touch His hand!
Adi Da said one time that one day we would
realize that, from a spiritual point of view, we had treated Him "shamefully"
in this life, in that so many of us, supposedly His devotees, resisted spiritual
practice and remained spiritual beginners, leaving Him unable to do the full Spiritual
Work He came to do. Lovers of the Bright One, we knew it was true when He said
it. And now that becomes more evident. He said, you left Me in My room watching
well, we did. And now it feels like there will be thousands upon thousands
who will weep that they never saw His bodily Incarnation and would have sat outside
that room for weeks for just a glimpse.
But what to do but turn again to
the Portal of Brightness, the heart of all and All. Why were some "chosen"
to see Him alive in His human lifetime and others not? I have no idea! But I am
Do you ever get lost in His eyes? What a marvel just
to gaze in His eyes! Just before His passing, we made a film of Him sitting in
Darshan. We used a lens to shoot very close up. I will share some of this with
you lovers of the Bright One when I get an edit together. We watched some last
night. Now that His body is not here, the sight of it on video is somehow so much
more potent . . . like what you can't have, you want even more. The miracle of
it! Looking at His Darshan like this reminds me of days in nature, when you spend
hours getting into looking at a cloud or a flower endlessly lost in the unfolding
perfection. Only, in this Divine Distraction, you need never return.
TO "ADI DA'S DIVINE MAHASAMADHI AND ADIDAM IN PERPETUITY"