Adi Da and Adidam: Finding Adi Da: You Will Always Come Back to Me

Claire: Jane, thank you for talking with me. Can you first tell us how you found out about Adi Da Samraj?

Jane: Well, it was back in the early 1970's. Like a lot of other young people in their 20's in the 1970's, I was looking for the meaning in life and the truth. When I got into college I began to think more for myself and to realize how shallow my understanding of life was. So, just like a lot of other people during that time, I began to look for some aspect of God that was real in my life.

And in the process of doing that, I went on a kind of spiritual quest out in the desert with a friend, and I had some mystical experiences. I had prayed and invoked the Divine in the midst of feeling afraid, and I saw this star above me with light that poured down and bathed my body and took away the fear. And I kept invoking God. I didn't know who else to call upon at that point.

What occurred was so profound for me that I began to look for a teacher, because I didn't understand what had happened. And it made me feel the mystery of the Divine and something greater than myself that was tangibly there.

So I began to look for a teacher. I was working at that time for an architectural firm and the accountant there was a Yogananda devotee.[1] I told her what had happened to me in the desert and she suggested that I read some spiritual literature. So I started reading Yogananda's books and went to a few lectures. It was a whole new turn in my life to be on a spiritual quest.

Then I met a man who, when I told him that I was looking for a teacher, said that I should go see Franklin Jones in Hollywood. ["Franklin Jones" was Adi Da's birth name.] And I'm thinking, "Franklin Jones from Hollywood?" That didn't sound spiritual like "Yogananda from India". So I was a little put off.

But he brought me The Knee of Listening (Adi Da Samraj's first published book) to read. On the cover was a picture of Franklin Jones. He didn't look like anything in my understanding of what a spiritual teacher should look like. So I didn't really want to read the book and I turned it face down on my desk. I don't know why, but I just didn't want to look at it. During the next couple of months, I read every other spiritual book I could get my hands on — Gurdjieff, Ouspensky, and many others.

But one day, I decided to take another look at the book I had been avoiding. So I picked it up and started reading. Ten pages into the book, I felt, "This man is speaking the Truth!" There was a recognition on some deep level. I could not stop reading. I stayed up all night and through the next day and into the evening. Even though I had resisted this book, even though I had resisted what Franklin Jones looked like, there was something about Him that spoke to me so deeply that I was changed personally from that day forward.

And based on reading that book, I wanted more. So I went down to the Melrose Avenue Ashram (in Los Angeles, California) where they were just starting to teach a course in June of 1973. I took the course for twelve weeks and at the end, they said that I should start thinking about becoming a student. I had been going to classes and evening events on a regular basis, but when it came time to becoming a formal member, I was resistant. It all seemed too much to me.

I hadn't met Bhagavan Adi Da yet; I had only heard His voice on tapes. One morning, I was lying on my bed in that state between being asleep and waking up. I had been in this dilemma for days: "What shall I do, what shall I do?" And this voice suddenly came — in me or around me, I have no idea from where — but I recognized it. It was Bhagavan's voice. And He said, "No matter where you go or what you do, you will always come back to Me."

I just sat up in bed, wide awake, and I started thanking Him. I was so grateful, because I had been in such a dilemma about this whole thing. He completely relieved me at heart and gave me the trust and confidence to sign up and become a formal member.

Claire: How did you first meet Bhagavan in person?

Jane: I had learned marquetry from my father. It's sort of like mosaic, done with wood veneers. So I made a plaque of the Dawn Horse logo in marquetry, as a gift for Bhagavan for His birthday. It was a logo that Bhagavan had designed Himself and He had explained to devotees the meaning of every aspect of the design from a dream that He had had. I copied that, and made it out of wood, and I brought it to the Ashram. I couldn't wait to give it to Him on His actual birthday, so I went about a week before, and I walked into the office and told the devotee there that I had this gift for Bhagavan for His birthday. I wanted to just hand it to her and leave, but she said, "Oh, well go right in, you can give it to Him yourself." And I had never seen Him before or met Him.

I was pretty nervous. It had always been very formal before. But now she was gesturing for me to go into Bhagavan's office, which we never went into as new students.

So I walked in the door, and this Wall of Force just overwhelmed me. I almost fell backwards. Bhagavan was just sitting there in the back of His office as if He were in meditation. He looked at me and gestured for me to come in.

Bhagavan's office was like a temple — absolutely pristine, and the air was thick with His Presence. It felt so sacred.

I walked up to Him and gave Him my gift. He was very gracious. He looked and looked at it and asked me questions. Every time I tried to answer His questions, my words felt like they would come right back and hit me in the face — I had never been in the presence of a Being as Holy and Divine as He is.

I had no profound recognition of Who He was at that time, but I did know He was my Teacher. And I had just made this gesture to become His student and change my life. . . and here I was in front of Him. He received my gift so graciously, and He said "Tcha". ["Tcha" was Adi Da's unique verbal expression of acknowledgement and Blessing of His devotees.]

After some time, I simply backed out of the room, because I couldn't take my eyes off of Him.

My legs were like spaghetti.

* * *

So that was my first meeting with Bhagavan Adi Da. It was very special.

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Finding Adi Da

[1]

Paramahansa Yogananda is the founder of the Self-Realization Fellowship. He is well-known as the author of the book, Autobiography of a Yogi.

"You Will Always Come Back to Me"